Dems Investigate Dry Holes

In the News-

"BP Exploration Alaska had to shut off oil supplies because of severe corrosion in its Alaskan pipeline and right on cue Democrats are now calling for an investigation of BP Exploration.

"It is appalling that BP let this critical pipeline deteriorate to the point that a major production shutdown was necessary," said Rep. John Dingell, the top-ranking Democrat on the House Energy and Commerce Committee, in a statement.

"The United States Congress has an obligation to hold hearings to determine what broke down here and what laws and regulations need to be improved to ensure problem pipelines like these are found and fixed earlier," Dingell said.

Seeking to slam the British company, Reuters reports that Democratic Rep. Edward Markey, who also serves on the House committee, said the shutdown reflects BP's chronic mismanagement of its U.S. drilling operations and that the company had been earning enough money to prevent the problem

"With oil above $70 per barrel and BP making record profits, it can afford to properly clean and maintain its pipelines," Markey said in a statement." -Jeff Freeland in the "National Ledger" (http://www.nationalledger.com/artman/publish/article_27267552.shtml).

In related news, Berle Piggle (D), County Commissioner for  Pecos County, Texas, called for an immediate investigation into the causes for the recent dry hole drilled by Midland, TX-based Buckaroo Resources that allegedly targeted Ellenberger natural gas.

"With natural gas prices so high, and consumers paying the price for corporate incompetence, greed, and neglect, the chronic mismanagement exhibited by these companies in drilling exploratory dry holes can no longer be overlooked.  It is properly the role of County Governments to investigate this and hold these companies accountable for this betrayal of the public trust", said Piggle, in a statement to Reuters, accompanied by a photo of the location in question showing the rig along with dead waterfowl in pools of black oil. 

Bloggers were quick to point out, however,  that if the well was truly dry, oil pits would not occur, and that the waterfowl shown, though common in the Texas Gulf Coast, have never been seen west of San Antonio... 350 miles east of the location.  They also noted that the photos seemed edited,  or "photoshopped", noting that  the section of the photograph showing the dead waterfowl and oil pits had a cloudy sky, while the rig location had the typical west Texas bright, sunny sky, with the cloud edge unnaturally straight.

"Companies like Bucakroo Resources are making a lot of money these days, and the fact that these rich boys continue to drill so-called "dry holes" smacks loudly of conspiring to keep prices high, thus depriving struggling county governments like ours and the school children of Texas from their rightful portion derived from the already criminally low severance taxes." Piggle continued.

"Uhh, I have given up even trying to figure out how to respond to this kind of political grandstanding", said Mike Palace, CEO of Bucakroo Resources, as he declined further comment on Piggle's accusdation.

"The people of this county and this state are not stupid", retorted Piggle.  "They know when they are being taken by greedy oilmen playing high level intrigue in their own backyards.  We have all seen Syriana, and here it is, by God, smack dab in Pecos County!"

"We will look after the people of this county and state to insure NO MORE dry holes are drilled by unscrupulous operators trying to take advantage of the unsuspecting citizens of this state and county, even if we have to stop all drilling to do it!" Piggle finished.

Meanwhile, state democratic officials commented anonymously that Piggle had emerged as a rising political star in Texas for the beleaguered party. 

"He stands up and speaks the truth that people want to hear!... Plus, he is from West Texas!  Finally we have someone who lives somewhere else than Austin and is NOT a plaintiff attorney or a professor!  Piggle could be our key to the Governership!" chortled one Democratic king maker.

"I dunno... I thought the oil companies lost money on dry holes" commented Delbert Flint, long time Democrat from Ozona.  "I guess that's why I don't vote democrat too much anymore, although me and my family have been democrat for over 100 years.  I just don't understand the issues any more.  Some feller from Austin did come down to tell us that the issues just weren't black and white any more, that they was "nuanced".  He said we needed to just trust the party 'cause they know whats best, but told Floyd Bixby that that we was pure hateful to tell his son Jack he shouldn't marry another fella, even though his boy Jack isn't a homasex'l. He also told us the State needed to get more money from rich folk for taxes so they could give the rest of us more and that the corporations were bad, but only when they make money, and that our President is a liar and that we should just chalk up Iraq as another Vietnam and we had no business helping Jews anyhow, 'cause Jews and America were the biggest terrorists, and that those were the Democratic principals.  Mebbe thay have loco weed in the water in Austin.  Sendin' my boy to A&M for damn sure.

Comments

[TexasDem]

You know, I don't know why you bother. This isn't funny, witty, or insightful at all. It just highlights why the rest of us hate you guys.

[houston oiler]

Pay no attention to Texas Dem. The truth just hurts is all.

[Jano]

I am in agreement...Ignore Texas Dem. I love this sight. I check for new postings everyday. Open Choke is intelligent and insightful.

[Tex Dinero]

Birkenstocks a little tite Tx Dem? Relax and enjoy it. You can't tell me that "Berle Piggle, Buckaroo Resources and Nuanced" used in a single column are not indeed funny. If you do some opposition research, you may find out that Bush was employed by Buckaroo as a Landman in the past. Use this column to your advantage for God's sake. Start w/the meeting in the Astrodome. Hang in there, you'll have the state back in your hands soon enough.

[TexasDem]

OK, I admit it is SOMETIMES funny, but this guy is a damn fascist most of the time. Must be on the board of Halliburton.

[Hill O' Beans]

I don't think the guy is a left winger, but he sure ain't a right winger either. My guess after reading this column for 3 years is that he is a middle roader with libertarian tendencies. I think he is an honest voice, TexasDem. He hasn't drunk anyones kool aid. Your party could learn from it.

[Toby Boyd]

I wonder if the Democrats would investigate the "mis management" of Disney World if it shut down for a month for maintenance?