This is a reprint of a February 2006 article, which still stands true today, about the scary extension of the right of eminent domain as stated by the Supreme Court back then...
Before we talk about my sinister idea about how I am going to steal, I mean ACQUIRE, all YOUR minerals, I want to pass an idea by you... a great, non partisan idea that would make us a better America. No kidding! It's simple, too. Here it is..... We are all filled up with rules and regulations. Every new one takes a little bit o' liberty away. Let's declare that we have achieved saturation. From now on, for any new rule or regulation we must remove an old one. Our politicians would have to spend at least half of their time getting rid of rules instead of dreaming up new ones while being serviced by lobbyists and pages. OK, back to how I am gonna own your a... I mean ALL THE MINERALS.... You have to thank the Lord for our Supreme Court. Because of their infinite wisdom, I now have a plan to take away all non-producing or poorly producing minerals from all you whiners that are bad managers of resources and veil your incompetence with silly talk about stupid things like "property rights", and "its mine", and "my granddaddy held on to the farm through the Great Depression and passed the farm and his minerals down over three generations now"... you know, the kind of yada yada that we Have Nots who weren't fortunate enough to have grandad's frigging wagon break down over what later became a major oil field in the most God forsaken land a cow or sheep ever saw are frankly sick of hearing. I am sure you are all aware by now of the Supreme Court's ruling last June that allows huge flexibility for my new l'il friends in local and state governments everywhere to excercise their God Given Natural Right of Eminent Domain. The ruling is seen as a "strong affirmation" that state and local governments have the right, yea, the obligation, to "pave the way" for private economic development, even when a new project is not guaranteed to succeed! Instead of yielding this critical governmental power in the timid, feel good, namby pamby ways my new government friends used it in the past, such as for stupid eye-rollers like highways, parks, and, my least favorite, greenbelts... this power is affirmed to be used for REAL good... like confiscating YOUR property and giving it to ME... a guy with a REAL PLAN for it... a plan that MIGHT even provide more tax revenues for the city, county, or state. Or it might not, because I don't really have to prove it. The important thing is, I Get What is Yours So Screw You. The new American Way. So here is my plan. If you don't lease me your minerals, I will petition my new l'il friends to take them from you via Eminent Domain and award them to me at "fair market value" as defined by my new friends, which is cheaper than you can get in the open markt, because I will promise my buddies much higher tax revenues. If the well I drill is dry, oh well. It's mine now anyway! See, the deal is, I will "create jobs" and, more importantly, higher tax revenues for our masters, where you "do not". I am even thinking of extending it to Golf Courses, like River Oaks and Memorial, which seem wide open for a dose of the good ol' Eminent Domain. I will just turn them into tasteful trailer parks and RV centers... I figure I could house 2-3 hundred a day, and pay a hell of a lot more in taxes because I'll lose the ag exemption. So enough with the whining about "property rights" and "its my property" and all that other drivel. If you had any real rights to "your" property, the Supreme Court would have said so! You see, it was just a simple misunderstanding that you actually "owned" your land or minerals. That's no REAL right, like having an abortion on demand, or having TVs and gymnasiums in prison, its just an old wives tale that we should be happy to finally rid ourselves . Take it from Washington D.C. Mayor Anthony Williams, also president of the National League of Cities, who praised the Supreme Court for upholding this important right of defenseless and poor governments... "one of the most powerful tools officials have to rejuvenate their neighborhoods"... or oilfields in my particular case, heh heh. The brilliant legal minds that formulated this decison were certainly NOT the "radical fringe" we have been warned about lately from Ted Kennedy, John Kerry, and Hillary during the Alito hearings, but rather thoughtful, prudent jurists like John Paul Stevens (wasn't he a Justice when we were in grade school?), Anthony Kennedy (doing the Kennedy name proud), David Souter (who still lives with his mom, and who is fighting, ironically, an Eminent Domain effort to condemn his home in Connecticut to turn it into an Inn and Memorial Museum and Memorial to the end of property rights in the US), Ruth Vader Ginsburg (the very measured jurist who came to the highest bench from the heady heights of running the staid, middle of the road ACLU, not like those fringe new judges Roberts and Alito, and "Even" Stephen Breyer. So, pretty soon I will wield the power of government like Damoclese's sword, to get what you have held undeveloped for me for all these years! Uh. Unless you get my stuff first. Damn, I hadn't thought of that!
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